Piano Keys, Finally
Ignoring the voice that says “you can’t,” and learning how “I can”
I grew up with a piano in the house. I learned to dust it, to care for it, to be gentle with the keys — but never to play it. My brother, whether self-taught or learning from school, had some some music training. but not me.
My Mom said I wasn’t musical. When I was an adult, she repeated that sentiment and said that it had always made her sad.
The thing is, I loved that piano. I loved to listen to her play her hymns. I rejoiced with her when she learned to play a song with her eyes closed. I was so proud of her when she had a strong role in her church choir production of the Easter Cantata.
I loved the piano like I loved her.
I loved music. I loved to sing and dance and make music any way I could. I just never had any guidance. I was often made to feel that my music, however joyous, was lacking. But I was never told how to make it better.
Music, in my family, was something you either had a talent in (similar to having a green thumb), or you didn’t do. I never felt any sense of guidance to help me remember notes or learn how music is formed or written or, really, anything. My singing voice wasn’t great — but others have told me it isn’t all that horrible, either. So who can tell?
My first semester of college, I took a music appreciation class. I loved all of it, the instruments and the history and the opera and musicals… Oh, it was pure joy, right up until the short section on music theory. Then it suddenly became sheer torture that I had to simply memorize by rote until the exam and then forget.
This just solidified the feeling that music, the production and performance of it, was not for me.
That was 27 years ago.
This year, my youngest began her first semester away at college. I have quite a bit of time on my hands. And those hands? They’re going to play.
I bought a digital piano. The reviews were great, and it went on serendipitous sale. I’ve been using an app to learn some basics. And I have some recommendations for how to find an instructor.
I may never (ever) be any good. But this item on my life list/bucket list is finally going to be checked off.
